On the heels of Tuesday’s confirmation that US fast food giant Burger King and Canadian Donut chain Tim Horton’s were merging, a spokesperson for Tim Horton’s also released to the press their plans to redefine what can be called a “toasted bagel” in America as well.
“We’ve done an excellent job of getting Canadians to accept that a barely warmed up bagel can be called ‘toasted’, and as part of this merger with Burger King, we’ll now be looking to expand into the US and change the way they think about something being classed as ‘toasted’ too.”
“For far too long, the word toasted has suggested a golden brown hue, well no longer! From now on, all of North America will come to accept that ‘toasted’ will mean sort of warm with a few burn lines to indicate that it was actually under a heat source. North America, and then the world!!”
The spokesperson then went on to say “Muahahahahahahahahahaha!”