IMF agent Ehtan Hunt began a recent mission to recover intelligence for the secret US government agency with having himself and his entire team disavowed. This will be the nine hundredth consecutive mission that Ethan and his team have been disavowed on.
Said Ethan, “It’s good to get the disavowal out of the way early. I find it really helps to gel the team together knowing that we have no back up. This is definitely the type of job where working with a safety net of hundreds of extensively trained agents, access to super computers and the best tech the world’s only super power has, well, it’s more of a hindrance. That’s why I tell my bosses to just disavow us at the first sign of trouble. Plus it frees us up a little.”
Asked for comment, one of Ethan’s team members was surprised at the news. “He gets us disavowed on purpose! What the fuck, man? They don’t pay us for while we’re disavowed, you know. And we don’t get back pay when we’re rehired at the end of the mission. That’s fucking bullshit man. I had no idea Ethan was the one doing that to us. I think I’m going to have to stop accepting his missions. Fuck that guy. My last three girlfriends have left me because I couldn’t keep up on the payments of my phone bill. Can you imagine if I had a house? I’d have had three foreclosed on by now.”
But Ethan was seemingly undeterred to the chaos he was causing in his compatriots lives. “You know, back in the day it used to be a bad thing to get disavowed. Back in the sixties, I’m told, it was the absolute worst thing that could happen to you. But now? Fuck, it happens all the damn time.”
“Thing is though. I’ve heard that some operatives run missions without having their team disavowed at all. I just find that crazy. How do you get anything done? I guess that’s why I’m the best.”