American Standards, the organization overseeing the pressure rating classes of pressure piping, announced this morning that their newest standard would include brand new, never before seen strength classes of piping.
“We are very proud of these new classes. And we feel that with these three new classes, we’ll be able to take piping well into the twenty first century and beyond.” The spokesperson told an assembly of the media.
“I’m sure everyone here is aware of our current standards. Among them, we have schedules 40, 80 and 160. Then we have our named ones, which are analogous, but slightly different to those. These would be Standard, Extra Strong, and, of course, Extra Extra Strong.”
“Which brings us to our new classes. These first two are beyond schedule 160 and Extra Extra Strong.”
“The first one, is called RFS, or Really Fucking Strong. It can also go by Really Fucking Heavy, or RFH. Then beyond that is Unbelievably Fucking Strong, or Heavy, with the acronyms UFS, or UFH.”
“Finally, we have also introduced another class for at the low end of the scale. This is really the bottom end of the scale, we’re calling that one MEH. That doesn’t stand for anything, it’s just the noise you make when you need some pipe but don’t need it to last a long time or hold any pressure at all. Sort of like a roof drainage spout. You kind of want the water moved over there, but you don’t need to spend a lot of money to do it. You could use MEH piping for that.”