Senator Tom Cotton (R-AS) held a press conference earlier today where he proudly announced that himself, and the other 46 Republican Senators that had sent an open letter to the leadership of Iran saying that negotiating with President Obama was a fruitless endeavor, had identified who was really to blame for the breach of protocol.
“Let me first say that it clearly isn’t our own fault. It’s not my fault, even though we used my laptop and I bought the stamp. It’s not Rand’s fault for posting it. We know this, I’m just stating what we know at this point.”
“We had suspected that it was President Osama’s, sorry, President Obama’s fault for trying to bring about a peaceful solution. But we now recognize that it’s not his fault that we wrote that letter.”
“No. The simple fact is that President Obama would not have been negotiating with Iran if it were not for the millions of American citizens that re-elected him in 2012, and also those who elected him in 2008. This whole fiasco is placed squarely on your shoulders.”
“I hope you’re happy with yourselves.” Senator Cotton said before starting to stride off the stage before pausing and coming back to the microphone. “You make me sick.” The Senator added before striding off the stage, taking one final pause to spit vengefully at the ground before slamming the door behind him.