Conspiracy Party Of Alberta candidate and leader John Johnson announced the platform for his party at a press conference this morning.
“If, or I would like to say when, we are elected to form a majority government, we pledge to complete the following acts within our first 100 days in office.” He announced.
“We pledge that we will eject all lizard people from Alberta. This is both lizard people in government, and lizard people in private enterprise. Lizard people from beyond the moon will no longer interfere with the affairs of this province.”
“Two. We pledge that the false queen Elizabeth and her progeny will not be allowed within the borders of this great province.”
“Three. We will set up our own currency, preliminary name ‘Albertollars’, which we’re not married to, which will be based on the gold standard.”
“Four. An overhaul of the entire court system, which will basically be an abolishment, with Common Law taking over.”
“Finally, abolishment of each free person’s corporate identity.”
SLN has yet to find anyone who understands these pledges.