Unemployed Man Devoting His Day To Ruining A Wasp’s

(Airdrie, AB) –Airdrie local Paul Boydcopp announced his plans to spend the rest of his day subtly messing with, and hopefully ruining, a local wasp’s.

“I’ve checked the job boards and there’s nothing new to apply to, so I need something else to do.  It’s not as much fun to wind up the dog as it used to be.  Now she just looks at me and sighs, which is no fun.  But the other day, while I was taking apart some weird structure in the back yard, I found a small wasp nest underneath it.  It’s not a full on nest, probably only a couple in it.  And I managed to drag the structure across the yard without getting stung, so they’re not all tetchy about it yet.
“But I remembered it this morning, and figured I’d do my part to be un-neighbourly toward them in the hopes they’ll move out.”

Paul’s actions are said to include the following.

-Placing a Bluetooth speaker by the nest and playing mariachi music non-stop for several hours

-Making and placing an egg salad sandwich by the nest

-Attracting the local mosquitos to the nest with the strategic placement of CO2 sources

-Turning the structure over so their nest is now upside down and all their furniture is on the wrong wall.

-Obtaining multiple fake nests from Canadian Tire and installing them in a circle around the nest

“That last one is my favourite.” Paul told us.  “I may save that for overnight.  Wait until the wasps have gone to sleep, then put six nests around theirs, big ones too.  Then tomorrow morning, they’ll come out of their nest and see six huge ones have been built while they slept.  It’ll freak ‘em out.  Can you imagine the wasps that could build six nests overnight?  They’ll probably just leave everything at that point.  Mind games, that’s how you get rid of wasps.”

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